Letting go

Letting go

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This content may include discussions of emotions, mental health, trauma, or other sensitive topics that could be triggering for some individuals. Please take care while engaging with this material and prioritize your wellbeing. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, distressed, or in need of support, we strongly encourage you to reach out to a trusted friend, support person, or a qualified mental health professional. You are not alone, and help is available.

This post is an uncomfortable one even as I write this especially being a private person. However, living an authentic life is an important value as I believing that the purpose of this post will be uplifting, encouraging and something that can resonate with people in overcoming barriers and strongholds to live a purposeful life.

Fear is a silent force that shapes our lives more than we often admit. It creeps in during moments of uncertainty, lingers in our decisions, and builds invisible walls around the life we truly want to live. It can be quite triggering to identify the root cause; therefore, it is important to cultivate kindness to yourself and not be abrasive. Because if we were honest with ourselves, introspection of fear and the root causes can be quite unsettling. Whether the root cause is fear of failure, rejection, or not being enough, it restricts us, holding us back from opportunities that could lead to growth, connection, and fulfillment and it can feel like were caged like a bird that is destined to fly beyond.

Many of us go through each day carrying silent burdens. While the world may see a composed exterior, underneath there are personal battles—anxiety, grief, self-doubt, or overwhelming responsibility. It seems that were living in times that seem more stressful Everyone is facing something, even if it’s hidden behind smiles or success. Fear often deepens that struggle, whispering that we must face it alone, that others have it together while we falter. But that’s rarely the full truth.

Society and culture plays a major role in feeding this fear. From a young age, we are taught what success should look like—wealth, status, perfection, constant achievement. We scroll through curated lives on social media, compare our behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlight reel, and begin to believe that falling short of these standards means we’re failing. The pressure to meet societal expectations builds silently, often shaping our choices more than our values do.

Fear can make us shrink ourselves to fit into expectations that were never meant for us. The dangerous thing about fear is that it can stop us from speaking up, trying something new, changing paths, or even asking for help. In doing so, we trade authenticity for approval, and potential for predictability. We live in the “what ifs” instead of the “what could be.”

For some, trauma often leaves a lasting imprint of fear that can deeply affect how choices are made in life. When the brain associates past pain or danger with certain situations, it becomes wired to avoid perceived threats—even if they’re no longer present. This can lead to hesitation, overthinking, or complete avoidance of opportunities, relationships, or change. The fear becomes a protective mechanism, but it can also limit growth and freedom. Everyday decisions become overwhelming as trauma skews perception, making safety feel more important than possibility. Healing involves recognising these patterns and slowly rebuilding trust in oneself and the world around us.

But acknowledging this struggle is the first step toward reclaiming freedom and this is a very hard step. When we realise fear is a common human experience—not a personal weakness—we start to build courage. Real courage isn’t the absence of fear, but moving forward in spite of it. It’s learning to act while afraid, to speak while trembling, and to keep going even when we don’t have all the answers and have everything all together.

We begin to truly live when we allow ourselves to step outside of fear’s shadow. Life isn’t meant to be a performance, but a journey marked by vulnerability, resilience, and honest connection. And as we embrace that, we also begin to accept that we are enough—not when we’re fearless, but when we’re real.

I will repeat this again as I am ending. The antidote to fear is vulnerability—the courage to show up as we are, especially with those we trust. When we share our fears, pain, or uncertainties with the right person whom we trust and and feel safe, the weight lessens. Vulnerability creates space for connection, reassurance, and healing. It breaks the silence fear thrives in and reminds us we’re not alone. Trusting others with our truth can feel risky, but it also opens the door to empathy, support, and deeper relationships. In choosing vulnerability, we choose courage over avoidance, and connection over isolation. It’s through being seen and heard that fear begins to lose its power over us.

I hope this provides some food for thought, giving you a chance to reflect in a safe, non-judgmental way so that you overcome fear and live a purposeful life.



13 thoughts on “Letting go”

  • I absolutely love this!! I’ve always been a transparent person but being transparent also brought emotions that were hidden underneath.. I tried in my own strength to overcome my issues but I kept failing. Once I took that step of recovery with others like me it was like a breath of fresh air and I started to feel free! There was no judgement just acceptance and love. And then God just opened the doors to all these messy but beautiful experiences with others dealing with the same thing. Fear will stop us from moving forward. Fear loves isolation but once we get past that the possibilities for God to work are endless!!! GREAT POST my friend 🩵

    • I like the way you explain emotions that we all have. Also that sentence “Because if we were honest with ourselves, introspection of fear and the root causes can be quite unsettling.” while I was reading I said “yeah that’s %100 correct. Loved voice record too. It was quite inspirational. Amazing post

  • True words… Real courage isn’t the absence of fear but moving forward in spite of it 😊👍🏾

    Thanks for sharing Kunle🙏🏽

  • What a powerful message ! it’s so encouraging, inspiring , uplifting and heart warming…. Beautiful said Kùnlè ❤️

  • A part of the masterpiece you have written about how we could overcome fear or how we could have good friends to speak up about what we struggle with that line “it can feel like we’re caged like a bird that is destined to fly beyond” was amazing, or maybe the soul of it. It was like a full poem within what you wrote. I’m sure you were drawing the words, not just writing them, because you extracted those words from your heart.
    But I would like to say something as well: we can encourage ourselves, overcome fear, and have good friends to speak up for, but we have to trust God in the end. He is the first step we need to take.

    Thank you Kunle for sharing that with me, you were amazing 👏🏼👏🏼

  • I like your way of conveying the message with simple words. It is very relaxing to read and so much hit to the point. Thank you for sharing 😊😊😊

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